I’m a guy, and a logical thinker, and my first marriage partially failed because I didn’t ‘get’ this one fact:

Emotions do not follow logical rules – at all!

Once you grasp that fact, it’s easier to deal with the rest of it. Of course it doesn’t stop our logical minds from hoping that the other person will react logically, but that hope in itself is illogical, as you said.

Also – we ‘male thinkers’ have to fight the urge to try to fix everything! You can’t repair one of these problems, the card can’t be replaced, no amount of rebooting will help. You just have to realize it’s an intermittent problem and wait until the system stabilizes again.

now i know you didn’t intend it this way, but i had to respond to this comment, no offense.

That’s rediculous although the quantities of certain hormones fluctuate differently in men and women (as they do from individual to individual) all else being equal, the amount of testosterone or estrogen in one’s brain does not make on ‘think’ male or ‘think’ female.

Quite contrary, we are encouraged from childhood by society and parents to ‘fill’ certain rolls, even if our parents give us no predetermined roles to strive for. Which role we choose altars our our internal thought process, so the notion that the ‘difference’ is male or female is Sexist.

For the lack of a better label, you’ve assumed the ‘role’ of a ‘breadwinner’ more so, an Over-acheiving breadwinner, and you’ve struggled to get where you are today, and over come a lot, but it nothing anyone who didn’t get where you are didn’t to some extent of another have to ‘get over’. traditionally the more conventional role women took in society was the ‘homemaker’ and while women’s lib movements Changed a lot of things, it didn’t change the fact that the roles available to people were any different than before, just that individuals could more easily choose to ‘alternate’ between roles traditionally choosen by one gender or another.

as far as the whole M thing goes, that’s more a matter of ‘emotional intellect.’ Something a lot of guys don’t strive to obtain any of. If you can’t understand what’s wrong with having a one night stand with the friend of a friend… (even assuming she knew it was a 1 night stand, and knew what she was in for) Especially when it was their party, and they introduced you. Man, heh.

BTW the issue is more ‘trust’ she trusted you to come to her party, have a good time, be nice to her guests… and not do anything stupid, like ‘wham bam thank you mame’ing them unless you’re REALLY sure that it wouldn’t bother them for that to happen because of 2 random people meeting at a party…