Comments on: Difficult things to admit…

By: Eric Nakagawa

Eric Nakagawa — Sat, 01 Sep 2007 21:56:30 +0000

Fear of success held me back for years… :). I’m glad you’ve realized this and welcoming success into your life!

By: Jay K

Jay K — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 17:29:32 +0000

Hi Erica,

Anonymous thought from the ether: Maybe you don’t have to deserve happiness, you just have to want it.

The next question is, “What makes you happy?” And how do you define success? Trite, yes. Sorry about that. But assuming you do want to be happy, screw deserving it. =)

By: Marc B.

Marc B. — Sun, 10 Dec 2006 16:23:04 +0000

hi Erica,
your honesty is truly heartwarming. I especially relate to it as I am in somewhat similar position with my web design and development company (losing money and wondering what the heck to do about it). I would suggest to you (in the spirit of “take what you like and leave the rest”) to look at whether running a big hosting company is really your passion. I know for myself that running a web design and development business is NOT my passion. Is it a wonder then that I have trouble attracting customers or charging fairly for my services? Of course not. MY truth is that I want out, that I was made to do something different, that God wants us all to have a good time and that how we know that we are really in tune with universal energy and living deeply is when we experience that joy. There would be nothing wrong if you decided to exit the business, surely there are people for whom running a hosting company WOULD be their passion. It would just have to done with integrity towards your customers and employees. I am currently working to figure this out and you are welcome to call me for support or encouragement..
Marc

By: Chris Yeh

Chris Yeh — Sat, 02 Dec 2006 16:54:56 +0000

By the way Erica, I love your thoughtfulness. If you’re interested, the intellectual discussion society that Ben Casnocha and I started, the Silicon Valey Junto (http://bigben.blogs.com/junto/who.html), is having a lunch meeting on 12/14 in Palo Alto.

We’ll be talking about the importance of love in business and our lives. I think you’d enjoy it, and I’d be delighted to have you attend as our invited guest.

By: Chris Yeh

Chris Yeh — Sat, 02 Dec 2006 16:47:07 +0000

Erica,

This is a fantastic post. I’ve always found (as you have) that the fear you try to deny is far more paralyzing than the fear you confront in the open. I admire your courage and candor, and wish you the best.

I always tell people I know who bootstrapped their ventures how much I admire them–I’ve always been a “raise VC” kind of guy, and while that has a lot of issues, I guaratee you that it is an easier road to hoe.

By: Ted Rheingold

Ted Rheingold — Thu, 30 Nov 2006 01:49:18 +0000

Not long after Dogster hit break even, I realized that while running a so-so business is easy, running a succesful business is hard. I had no idea how little pressure I felt when I was losing a little of my money each month … I was supposed to be failing. Once we proved it really worked, the pressure was /huge/ in my mind to not fritter that. All decisions became much more important. I’ve very glad I’ve had two firm partners in this whole thing because that allows any one of us to freak out and lose faith, yet be caught and re-emboldended by the other two.

You’re already a giant success in our books. Go for it!

By: Leigh

Leigh — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 23:14:31 +0000

I have a similiar fear. It’s the reason I’ve been so angry with myself lately. There have been a lot of things that have happened outside of my control in the past 10 years (well, most of my life) but there have been a lot of things that were in my control that I was too afraid to grab the reigns and move forward with. It’s one of the things I’ve been struggling to change in my life… it’s the foundation of why I’m going to school… to prove to myself that I can do something… and succeed. I know that my life is mine and that I can do anything with it… it’s just hard acting on that knowledge.

You’ve managed to do a lot and I hope you can give yourself credit for that while acknowledging the weaknesses you’ve been brave enough to state publically.

By: Philippe Mesritz

Philippe Mesritz — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 23:07:22 +0000

Erica — you’ve done an excellent job thus far. There may be some areas of improvement, to be sure, but generally I’ve only heard positive comments. Continue your work. I’d love to speak with you as well, at some point, if you can find the time. You’ve got my cell in your system if you want to simply discuss. — Philippe, ISU

By: Steve P

Steve P — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 22:24:24 +0000

I’m considering starting a company, but if I wasn’t scared, I would have started it a long time ago. You should be proud of your company, and everything you have done so far.

By: TechnoLust

TechnoLust — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 21:37:11 +0000

Of course you are afraid! We’re all afraid. I’ll give you a hint… it’s not really failure you are afraid of, it’s not being in control. (Same thing I’m afraid of, but it took me a long time to figure it out.) I’ve seen evidence of this in your business and personal life. If you fail because you tried and couldn’t make it happen, then you aren’t in control. If you fail because you didn’t give it everything you had, then you were still in control. So you’d rather fail and maintain an illusion of control than to try and fail. The funny part is, you still aren’t in control, because you let your fear control you. It’s some weird circular logic shit to get your mind around, but it’s true for most people. So go out there REALLY be in control, don’t let fear push you around.